It seems like a cool idea. The company offers to hold a "conference call" and the shareholders think, "Great, what a good idea!" They think they can raise all kinds of queries, pin down the CEO with some hard-hitting questions, find out what's really going on.
What happens? To start with, they get a sales message, written by professional PR people whose only aim is not to tell the truth but in many cases, to pull the wool over the heads of those participating in the conference call. They also love weasel words:
"Certain statements on this conference call will constitute forward-looking statements and actual results could differ materially. In particular, the financial projections contained in this conference call were developed based on current estimates and numerous assumptions. These estimates and assumptions reflect subjective judgments concerning future results and may be incomplete or incorrect, and unanticipated events and circumstances may occur, causing these estimates or assumptions to be wrong…"
Why can't they just own up and tell the truth?
Next, the conference call continues with some of the usual "bullshit" that's so typical these days:
"We have made enormous progress towards our goals, ahead of the timetable we had established. Since our last conference call, we have achieved a reduction in force of approximately 700 people. We expect to see a significant benefit from our expense reductions in Q2, with the full benefit being achieved in Q3 and beyond."
Next, after a long delay and no serious questions asked, the typical conference call continues like this:
Let me now turn to the financial and operating results...
Let me give you the key operational highlights for Company X during the quarter: We set a new standard for providing service level, fault and customer management with our breakthrough root cause and customer impact analysis capabilities..."
Over the last quarter Company X almost doubled, its worldwide sales force from 14 to 25 people, creating a stronger and more independent sales operation…
For Q1, Company X lost between $3.5 and $4.5 million. We expect Company X's losses to narrow gradually as the increase in revenue and margins are offset somewhat by continued investment in sales and marketing…
This concludes Company X's highlights. I'd like to now turn the call over to the President, who will address the quarterly highlights.
No one's asked a question yet!! Instead of real-time interviews when proper questions can be asked, all the shareholders have heard so far is some bullshit PR sales talk.
"Let me share some of, Company X's important accomplishments during the quarter:
We had some important customer wins…
We announced partnerships…
On our last call, we had said that we expected to achieve an annual growth rate of approximately 2000% as we exited the fiscal year. Building on the base we established in Q1, we now expect to sustain in Q2 and beyond with annual growth in excess of 4000%... Surprisingly, earnings per share are substantially down, and we blame this on the rollout costs of our new software.
We have successfully synergized these strengths to achieve a significant time-to-market advantage. This is visible in the Q1 operational highlights, some of which are:
SILENCE!!
That concludes Company X's highlights. Let me now turn the call over to the CEO to discuss the consolidated financial results for Company X… We continue to hold aproximately 11.5 million shares…
We continue monetizing our holdings in a rationale manner, while remaining a significant investor. Toward that end, Company X has agreed to file, by mid-July 2001, a shelf S-3 registration statement under which we are entitled to sell up to 2,000,000 shares per quarter.
We are ahead of schedule in completing the sale or phase-out of non-core businesses.
Thank you. Before we begin the question and answer period, let me make some closing remarks:
First, we took on an enormous task this quarter - and we completed it…zzzzzzz.
With that, I would like to turn the call back to the operator for questions and answers. To accommodate all callers, please restrict yourself to one question, and time permitting, with follow-up questions.
TIME PERMITTING!!! The poor shareholders have only had to listen to bullshit for the past half-hour; now they are told to restrict their questions, and that there may not be enough time to answer!
Before anyone has the chance to open their mouths, and actually ask a real question, someone reads the corporate Riot Act:
Certain statements on this conference call will constitute forward-looking statements and actual results could differ materially. In particular, the financial projections contained in this conference call were developed based on current estimates and numerous assumptions. These estimates and assumptions reflect subjective judgments concerning future results and may be incomplete or incorrect, and unanticipated events and circumstances may occur.
Finally, the financial information we will present during this call is pro forma only and may differ from final financial statements due to adjustments as a result of the transformation. For detailed discussion of factors that could cause actual results to vary from these forward-looking statements, please refer to the company's annual report on Form 10-K for fiscal year 2000.
THANK YOU FOR PARTICIPATING IN THIS CONFERENCE CALL.
What a load of old bull! How many people, seriously, get answers to their questions? Moreover, if the poor shareholders can be fobbed off with such forward-looking tripe, in the case of casino software licensees, how can they ever hope to get at the truth?
The licensees bring the business; they bring the players, Mr. Rivkin.
Why don't you answer the questions below?
Questions for the Cryptologic's conference call this Tuesday
Mr. Rivkin, we would like to know why your company refuses to supply the following answers to one of your licensees, most probably to all your licensees.
Your licensee wants to know on the same report, for each of its clients:
- The name of the player
- The account number of the player
- The amount(s) of each deposit with the date
- The amount(s) of each withdrawal (if any) with the date
- How much was won or lost with the date
- The balance in the account…
Every honest game developer supplies this elementary data, but not you. What you supply is shit, and there is no other word for it.
This kind of unacceptable behavior is typical of companies cheating their licensees and/or laundering money.
Your company also promised figures in real time, but you lied, and never delivered it.
It's the licensee who brings you the player with the money, and the licensee is entitled to know what happened to this player. If you can't answer, your company is crooked.
